Thursday, June 21, 2012

I hate Apartments

Tell me one good thing about them. Having a pool/workout community doesn't count because technically that has nothing to do with the living that goes on within in an apartment. (This is the biggest and perhaps only pro I can think of). And you might be thinking "I can call up maintenance anytime to fix something" to which I say, "define 'fix;".

    Normally I'm not a complaining bugger but today our water was shut off with no forewarn. All day. You never realize how much you need and use water on a consistent basis until you go to flush the loo and nothing happens. Or you go to wash your hands and nothing comes out. Or rinse a spoon. Or add water to your dinner recipe. Or come in from a hot morning at the pool ready for a cold drink of water and its been turned off and your 2-year old daughter guzzles down your last water bottle and you feel bad about wanting to yank it out of her small, innocent hands before she's done but your mouth shrivels as you watch the last drop disappear.* In our community email, it says it was an emergency water valve issue. But as I mentioned, I was at the pool this morning and overheard two maintenance workers talking about shutting off the water and it didn't sound like an emergency to me.

     Let me preference this rant by the fact that we have the weirdest neighbors that have only fueled my perseverance towards publishing and getting us out of here. Like the one across from us who will stomp out onto her porch and rant to the world about all her problems. Then she repeats the process about ten times slamming the door every time she goes back in. Oh, and she also likes to spray shaving cream at an imaginary Obama and any office manager that comes to tell her to stop.
   Needless to say, I'm pretty ready to move. Preferably to a house with 3+ acres. Because nothing ever goes wrong with your water or appliances in a house (hehe).

   The good thing out of living in an apartment in the middle of the desert with wacky neighbors and no water is that as mentioned it really has spurred me on to write more/better/faster/consistently. Whenever these things happen I always think "As soon as I publish I won't have to deal with this." As soon as I publish maybe we can move away from a house...I can finally decorate because we'll stay in one place...I can stock my pantry with tons of food so that I don't run out of powdered sugar and forget about it until I'm ready to frost my feel-better-about-no-water-situation chocolate cake and can find a 1/4 cup of powdered sugar (which any baker knows if about one individual serving of frosting. And even less if you were counting on drowning yourself in chocolate soothing). I can make more friends. I can have an awesome community of readers and book affecionados and we can chat about books 24/7. I can finally have something of success under my belt. I can finally look good with blonde highlights. I can shop at JCrew and their clothes will magically look great on one whose chest isn't as flat as a board and who has hips.

 Publishing will probably end world hunger.

Bring it on published novel. I'm ready for you.

*And you're 7 1/2 months pregnant which means you sustain yourself on water. Esp through a Nevada summer.


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